2009

Verjetno ste že opazili, da zadnje čase na stene sobe s pogledom na moje srce, lepim predvsem slike, medtem ko sem z besedami skopa. Žal. Brez skrbi, prepričana sem, da je to le trenutno stanje in da bom kmalu nazaj polna fraz, besednih zvez, metafor in vse druge nesnage, s katero si čistim dušo. Danes je zadnji dan leta 2008. Nepozabnih 12 mesecev. Brez dvoma. A prepričana sem, da me čaka 12 še lepših. Bolj iskrenih in nasmejanih. How do I know that? Well, I have connections remember! ;-)

Nocoj brez zadržkov spijte kozarček šampanjca, ali pa dva, ali tri. Kdo bi štel. Poslovite se od preteklosti in pustite za sabo vse tegobe zadnjega leta. Za 2009 morate biti spočiti in svobodni ... Pa na zdravje in se vidimo v letu 2009! Rada vas imam. Tako ali drugače.

Ultimate Puppy Love - Callisto

Right before 2008 turns into 2009 I welcomed a new creativity setter in my life ... He's 20cm, 2kg and 11 weeks old ... I proudly present Callisto (my 2nd angel with this name, 1st one is this one ). He came, rocked my life and stole my nights. Only boy in my life and ultimate puppy love ...

Wishes

... coming true! I was asking for snow all day yesterday ... And vouila! It's snowing, believe it or not! And it was not even on near forecast! From now on I'm starting to believe that I do have connections up there ... So step in line people, hand me your wishes and I will do my best to pass them on to The Big One ;-) There is no such things as impossible dreams ... Not in my life. No way. Merry X-Mas everybody! Kepp your dreams alive.

Getting Old (er)

Dear Santa ...

Please bring me some snow, so I can get old(er) while making snow angels ...

I am also asking you to keep all the people without personality away from me. Because lately I've become extremly intolerant against them... I thank you in advance, for keeping my friends and loved ones happy and healthy and, if it is not too much, I would appreciate a hug here and there. Just to let me know I am safe and have the right to be fragile every once in a while. That's all I need. For everything else I will take care on my own. As always....

*p.s. Don't even ask me to be a good girl, because you know damn well I always am. Don't mind Lola, she's just visiting sometimes, when Shia is about to get boring :-)

*p.s. 2 Thank you ...

The Truth

Nobody deserves your tears, but whoever deserves them, will not make you cry.

*Gabriel Garcia Marquez*

Poslanstvo

In potem pride dan, ko sem se pripravljena zopet usesti za računalnik in pustiti prstom, da z muko prevedejo moje misli na papir. Ne. Na ekran ... Pač, prekletstvo 21. stoletja. Računalnik is a must. Hate to admit but I am one of the computer junkies. In prav nobene želje ne čutim po tem, da bi se ozdravila te odvisnosti. Pač. Srečni odvisnik... Anyways, spet sem zašla. S poti. S steze, ki pelje do mojega trenutnega razpoloženja. Tudi v realnosti zadnje čase večkrat skrenem. Kar tako. Ker lahko. Ker mi paše. Ker mi je na trenutke vseeno.

In potem zavijam na poti, kjer še nisem bila. Brez pomislekov in obžalovanj. In srečujem. Ljudi in prikazni. Z večino se prav lepo ujamemo. Kako tudi ne, ko pa smo skupaj ujeti v tej farsi zadnjih mesecev. Smejemo se. A le zato, da bi drug drugega prepričali, da smo v redu. Da nam nič ne manjka in da verjamemo v to, da je vse za nekaj dobro. Igramo. Prepričljivo? Verjetno ne. A komu mar. Pač smo. Živimo.

In potem ju srečam. Ne le enkrat. Dvakrat. In se zdrznem. In bežim, a mi ne uspe. Vedno me najdeta. In potem jokam. Ker vidim, da trpita. In meni ni vseeno. Kar naenkrat mi ni vseeno. Zakaj? Ker vem, da v tem trenutku ne morem pomagati sebi, a zato lahko njima.

In potem se zavem. Svojega poslanstva. Jaz sem tista. Ki pride, pokaže, reši in gre. Kdaj? Ko me potrebujejo. Ko se jim zdi, da se morajo sprijazniti s tem kar imajo, čeprav jih to ne osrečuje. I come and I show them. That they deserve better. And that they are strong enough to change their lifes. Because they deserve it. Because they have huge things waiting for them just around the corner. They just need to take one step towards it. And when they do it ... my work is done. I move on ... knowing this is my mission and hoping one day I will be saved too ...